1 00:00:03,259 --> 00:00:04,259 You're welcome. 2 00:00:04,600 --> 00:00:05,600 Oh, it's the woman. 3 00:00:06,820 --> 00:00:10,160 They would say about my uncle Moreau, he was a biologist. 4 00:00:11,380 --> 00:00:13,760 One time he crossed a tarantula and a horse. 5 00:00:15,260 --> 00:00:16,259 Where'd he get it? 6 00:00:16,260 --> 00:00:19,200 He doesn't know, but if it bites you, you can write it to the doctor. 7 00:00:32,560 --> 00:00:33,560 Welcome back. 8 00:00:34,500 --> 00:00:37,560 Your dreams were your ticket out. 9 00:00:38,640 --> 00:00:44,480 Welcome back to that same old place that you laughed about. 10 00:00:45,380 --> 00:00:48,920 Well, the names have all changed since you hung around. 11 00:00:49,660 --> 00:00:53,440 But those dreams have remained and they've turned around. 12 00:00:54,300 --> 00:00:56,640 Who would have thought they'd lead you? 13 00:00:56,940 --> 00:01:01,520 Who would have thought they'd lead you? Back here where we need you. Back here. 14 00:01:02,540 --> 00:01:08,200 We tease him a lot because we got him on the spot. Welcome back. 15 00:01:09,060 --> 00:01:12,540 Welcome back. Welcome back. Welcome back. 16 00:01:20,120 --> 00:01:21,720 Hey, that's me. 17 00:01:22,340 --> 00:01:23,340 That's me. 18 00:01:23,480 --> 00:01:24,480 Come here. 19 00:01:26,740 --> 00:01:28,400 What's taking him so long, huh? 20 00:01:29,180 --> 00:01:31,820 Hey, look, you sure Covelli's going to show up? Sure, sure, I'm sure. 21 00:01:32,120 --> 00:01:34,920 Yeah, well, I can't stand out in this cold much longer, you know. My afro's 22 00:01:34,920 --> 00:01:36,400 liable to freeze and snap off. 23 00:01:37,780 --> 00:01:40,420 Look, Covelli's rotten, but the man is reliable. 24 00:01:41,520 --> 00:01:43,760 Hey, look, you sure Mr. Cartier don't know nothing about this? He don't know 25 00:01:43,760 --> 00:01:46,620 nothing about this. Well, I just hope Covelli's bringing enough term papers 26 00:01:46,620 --> 00:01:47,620 all of us guys to pass. 27 00:01:47,900 --> 00:01:51,200 Yup, five bucks a piece. They're all guaranteed A's. 28 00:01:51,500 --> 00:01:53,620 Top quality, huh? You bet, just the tops. 29 00:02:13,520 --> 00:02:14,520 What's the matter with Freddy? 30 00:02:15,060 --> 00:02:16,540 Does it have something to do with my deodorant? 31 00:02:17,980 --> 00:02:18,980 What are you doing here? 32 00:02:22,900 --> 00:02:23,900 I work here. 33 00:02:25,120 --> 00:02:28,100 Well, I bet you'd like to be up in your classroom right now preparing for your 34 00:02:28,100 --> 00:02:31,520 classes, huh? I mean, a teacher like you must prepare 15, 20 minutes just for 35 00:02:31,520 --> 00:02:32,439 one class. 36 00:02:32,440 --> 00:02:35,540 Look, I know I go into your class, you're one prepared teacher. Epstein, 37 00:02:35,540 --> 00:02:36,920 going upstairs right now. 38 00:02:37,280 --> 00:02:38,280 Are you coming? 39 00:02:39,430 --> 00:02:43,010 No, no, I'm going to stay in here and break in a new pair of socks. 40 00:02:44,510 --> 00:02:47,070 All right, well, come on. Claire starts in a couple of minutes. Yeah, yeah. 41 00:02:58,710 --> 00:03:01,670 Well, well, well, Epstein. 42 00:03:02,510 --> 00:03:05,790 The man who put the sweat into Sweathog. 43 00:03:07,250 --> 00:03:08,250 Hear that, Epstein? 44 00:03:08,850 --> 00:03:11,450 Covelli say you put the sweat in sweat hugs. 45 00:03:12,670 --> 00:03:13,890 I heard him, Murray. 46 00:03:15,290 --> 00:03:17,470 Look, you got the term papers? 47 00:03:18,110 --> 00:03:20,510 Yeah, I got a more important question. 48 00:03:20,870 --> 00:03:22,130 Have you got the money? 49 00:03:22,350 --> 00:03:24,150 Yeah, I got 20 bucks. 50 00:03:24,390 --> 00:03:26,550 I want four of them. Yeah, you sure? 51 00:03:26,850 --> 00:03:32,230 Because for another five bucks, you can have your teacher pushed under a bus. 52 00:03:34,110 --> 00:03:36,510 And for an extra ten... 53 00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:38,140 I'll make it look like an accident. 54 00:03:40,620 --> 00:03:42,080 That's cute, Murray. I like that. 55 00:03:42,440 --> 00:03:45,300 All right, come on, come on, hurry up. I don't want nobody to see me here 56 00:03:45,300 --> 00:03:48,720 talking. I feel disgusted what I'm doing. I feel sick inside. 57 00:03:49,060 --> 00:03:51,600 Yeah, yeah, I heard that before, sure. All right, let's see. 58 00:03:52,080 --> 00:03:56,740 Epstein, your category was social studies for $20. 59 00:03:57,240 --> 00:03:59,460 That sounds like a game show, don't it? 60 00:04:01,000 --> 00:04:04,680 Hear that, Epstein? Covelli wants to know if it sounds like a game show. 61 00:04:06,910 --> 00:04:09,190 Sure. I'll take Paul in to block. 62 00:04:12,330 --> 00:04:16,990 All right, all right. Come on, come on, Murray. Let's go here. Let's show Mr. 63 00:04:17,290 --> 00:04:20,190 Epstein our impressive line of term papers. 64 00:04:24,910 --> 00:04:26,830 All right, I think you're going to like this. 65 00:04:27,110 --> 00:04:28,510 Oh, this is a beautiful one. 66 00:04:28,970 --> 00:04:33,890 Do you mind if I smoke the real story of Joan of Arc? 67 00:04:38,320 --> 00:04:40,200 It's a strong paper. A lot of vowels. 68 00:04:41,120 --> 00:04:42,120 You'll like it. 69 00:04:43,120 --> 00:04:45,040 You sure these papers was on the up and up? 70 00:04:45,260 --> 00:04:47,860 Hey, hey, hey. Come on. These papers are guaranteed. 71 00:04:48,460 --> 00:04:49,880 Or your money back. 72 00:04:50,300 --> 00:04:54,420 Oh, that's what I like about you, Covelli. You stand behind what you 73 00:04:58,460 --> 00:04:59,460 Hey, what's happening, monkey? 74 00:04:59,700 --> 00:05:00,700 Hey, 75 00:05:02,160 --> 00:05:03,820 I got them. I got them. 76 00:05:04,080 --> 00:05:07,920 What are they on? What are they on? You got the dust. 77 00:05:14,190 --> 00:05:15,190 on paper on Duff. 78 00:05:15,410 --> 00:05:16,470 I hate Duff. 79 00:05:17,570 --> 00:05:21,590 Besides, Duff killed my great -grandmother. 80 00:05:23,010 --> 00:05:27,830 What? Duff killed your great -grandmother? Oh, no, Freddy. Tell me it 81 00:05:31,010 --> 00:05:34,110 Okay, I'm gonna tell y 'all. I'm gonna tell you just how it happened. See, one 82 00:05:34,110 --> 00:05:37,530 day, my great -granny was shaking her mop out a window, when all of a sudden, 83 00:05:37,570 --> 00:05:42,190 this big, powerful gust of wind came in and sucked her and the mop straight up 84 00:05:42,190 --> 00:05:42,859 and took them. 85 00:05:42,860 --> 00:05:43,860 Cleo over to New Jersey. 86 00:05:46,380 --> 00:05:47,380 You're lying. 87 00:05:50,020 --> 00:05:51,100 Would you believe Pennsylvania? 88 00:05:53,000 --> 00:05:57,160 Here, how do we got that settled here, Vinnie? You got the Great Irish Potato 89 00:05:57,160 --> 00:05:58,160 Famine. 90 00:06:00,600 --> 00:06:02,620 The Great Irish Potato Famine? 91 00:06:03,180 --> 00:06:06,200 What's so good about the Great Irish Potato Famine? 92 00:06:06,420 --> 00:06:09,760 I know what that was about. I know that one. That's when the whole country ran 93 00:06:09,760 --> 00:06:10,760 out of potatoes. 94 00:06:11,630 --> 00:06:13,230 The whole country ran out of potatoes? 95 00:06:13,610 --> 00:06:14,610 Yeah. 96 00:06:15,530 --> 00:06:17,930 Imagine all the butter and sour cream that was left over. 97 00:06:19,930 --> 00:06:23,810 Well, speaking of sour cream, where's Arnold Horschak? 98 00:06:24,310 --> 00:06:27,210 Oh, Arnold's already in there having his conference with Mr. Carter. 99 00:06:27,550 --> 00:06:29,990 So, Arnold, have you decided what you're going to do your term paper on? 100 00:06:31,330 --> 00:06:32,330 So, Mr. 101 00:06:32,590 --> 00:06:36,410 Carter, how's the family? 102 00:06:38,010 --> 00:06:39,110 Fine. Everybody's fine. 103 00:06:39,740 --> 00:06:42,320 I think an interesting subject... The twins are getting big. 104 00:06:43,680 --> 00:06:46,780 Yeah, they're growing every day. You know, Arnold, I'd like to see you do 105 00:06:46,780 --> 00:06:50,920 something different. And ain't it amazing how fast Mrs. Carter got her 106 00:06:50,920 --> 00:06:51,920 back? 107 00:06:53,620 --> 00:06:54,620 Amazing. 108 00:06:55,060 --> 00:06:56,060 You too. 109 00:06:58,440 --> 00:07:00,540 Arnold, are you going to do a term paper on my family? 110 00:07:26,380 --> 00:07:27,380 Don't go away, okay? 111 00:07:27,540 --> 00:07:28,540 I'll be here. 112 00:07:30,280 --> 00:07:33,780 Epstein, I don't want to be pushy, but would you mind telling me what I'm doing 113 00:07:33,780 --> 00:07:35,320 my term paper on? Sure. 114 00:07:35,780 --> 00:07:37,940 You got Joseph Stalin and the Purges. 115 00:07:41,900 --> 00:07:43,180 Who were the Purges? 116 00:07:44,980 --> 00:07:47,100 Uh, I think it was Joe's backup group. 117 00:07:48,500 --> 00:07:51,900 Yeah, yeah, they had a big hit a while back called the Vulgar Boatmen. 118 00:07:53,160 --> 00:07:55,660 The Vulgar Boatmen? Oh, I hate the Vulgar Boatmen. 119 00:07:57,360 --> 00:08:01,080 Because on a Staten Island ferry, you see them all the time. They're dirty. 120 00:08:01,080 --> 00:08:02,320 talk dirty. They spit on themselves. 121 00:08:04,460 --> 00:08:05,460 Disgusting. I hate them. 122 00:08:06,640 --> 00:08:07,640 Hi, guys. 123 00:08:07,780 --> 00:08:08,860 Hey, Angie. What's happening? 124 00:08:09,100 --> 00:08:12,360 Have you started your term paper yet? Yeah, I already finished mine. Look, 125 00:08:12,420 --> 00:08:13,199 they're right here. 126 00:08:13,200 --> 00:08:16,540 Oh, I was thinking about doing mine on Marilyn Monroe. 127 00:08:18,300 --> 00:08:22,040 Why stop there? Why not do all those bleach blondes and call it Roots? 128 00:08:30,020 --> 00:08:34,080 Listen, little one, I just don't feel right about this whole thing. I mean, 129 00:08:34,080 --> 00:08:37,179 turning somebody else's time paper, that's not right. I'm sorry, but... Come 130 00:08:37,179 --> 00:08:40,179 Anna Horshack. It's time you faced the facts of life. 131 00:08:42,419 --> 00:08:44,820 Not those facts. 132 00:08:48,360 --> 00:08:53,420 Now, look, it's better to cheat with Anna than fail with disgrace. 133 00:08:56,020 --> 00:08:58,560 All right, now, I want you to get back in there. 134 00:08:58,960 --> 00:09:01,020 And I want you to remember one thing for me. 135 00:09:01,580 --> 00:09:02,940 Joseph Stalin. 136 00:09:03,500 --> 00:09:08,320 You say it. Joseph Stalin. That's it. He got it. Joseph Stalin. Would you repeat 137 00:09:08,320 --> 00:09:10,340 that for me? Who are you getting there? 138 00:09:15,600 --> 00:09:17,840 Everything okay, Arnold? Joseph Stalin! 139 00:09:22,140 --> 00:09:24,100 Was he in the bathroom with you and Epstein? 140 00:09:29,110 --> 00:09:33,170 That's what I wanted to do. My term paper on Joseph Stalin. 141 00:09:33,670 --> 00:09:36,150 How I admire Joseph Stalin. 142 00:09:38,170 --> 00:09:40,950 Arnold, if you want to do a term paper on Stalin, that's fine. 143 00:09:41,210 --> 00:09:42,530 Let's not admire the man. 144 00:09:42,850 --> 00:09:47,290 He sent 25 million innocent men, women, and children to labor camps in Siberia. 145 00:09:47,750 --> 00:09:49,090 What do you admire about that? 146 00:09:49,830 --> 00:09:50,830 The trains. 147 00:09:50,990 --> 00:09:52,330 He always got them there on time. 148 00:09:57,640 --> 00:10:00,420 Go to the library, read a little bit about Joseph Stalin. 149 00:10:00,820 --> 00:10:03,340 You find him in between Attila the Hun and Jack the Ripper. 150 00:10:04,880 --> 00:10:06,680 Right you are, Mr. Carter. 151 00:10:07,240 --> 00:10:10,960 And as they say in Siberia, boo! 152 00:10:13,660 --> 00:10:14,660 Yeah. 153 00:10:18,060 --> 00:10:21,040 Mr. Carter, are you ready to see me now? 154 00:10:22,240 --> 00:10:24,780 I'm ready to see you now. Good, because I'm running late. 155 00:10:26,910 --> 00:10:30,890 Mr. Carter, I just want to tell you how excited I am about this term paper. 156 00:10:32,430 --> 00:10:34,110 It's all I can think about lately. 157 00:10:35,510 --> 00:10:37,770 Really, Vinnie? Yeah. I'm happy to see you so involved. 158 00:10:38,150 --> 00:10:39,970 Oh, yes. I'm really into it. 159 00:10:42,570 --> 00:10:44,110 Well, what subject are you going to write about? 160 00:10:45,090 --> 00:10:46,090 What? 161 00:10:48,410 --> 00:10:50,850 What subject have you decided to do your term paper on? 162 00:10:58,640 --> 00:11:00,120 Just give me a second. I'll think of it. 163 00:11:01,360 --> 00:11:02,880 Does it have anything to do with history? 164 00:11:03,300 --> 00:11:06,500 Yeah. The great French fry phantom. 165 00:11:14,220 --> 00:11:17,880 French fry phantom. Yeah. I just heard the news. No potatoes. 166 00:11:20,740 --> 00:11:25,800 I think it happened in England, the island. Some place where they speak 167 00:11:25,800 --> 00:11:26,800 really funny. 168 00:11:28,110 --> 00:11:30,090 As opposed to Brooklyn, where we speak it perfectly. 169 00:11:31,750 --> 00:11:34,070 What are you talking about, French fried phantom? 170 00:11:34,670 --> 00:11:37,770 The phantom, you know, when you can't get nothing to eat, you have a phantom. 171 00:11:41,030 --> 00:11:42,030 Famine. 172 00:11:42,510 --> 00:11:43,970 Famine. French fried famine? 173 00:11:44,590 --> 00:11:45,910 Irish potato famine? 174 00:11:46,110 --> 00:11:47,110 Yeah, that's it, that's it. 175 00:11:47,810 --> 00:11:49,910 It's the same thing, I just said it a little different. 176 00:11:51,670 --> 00:11:54,910 Of course, it's the same thing. French fried phantom, Irish potato famine. 177 00:11:56,360 --> 00:11:58,380 Must have been really terrible, huh, Mr. Kai? 178 00:11:59,200 --> 00:12:02,040 I'm imagining going to a place in the country, you could order a hamburger. 179 00:12:04,520 --> 00:12:06,200 And get a side order of nothing. 180 00:12:23,840 --> 00:12:24,920 I just reached out. 181 00:12:32,310 --> 00:12:34,010 How are you doing, my spicy pumpkin? 182 00:12:36,870 --> 00:12:40,350 I'm in a great mood today, Carter. Did you see that new Spanish teacher I 183 00:12:40,710 --> 00:12:43,290 Oh, yeah, I just saw her in the hall. She's a little difficult to understand, 184 00:12:43,430 --> 00:12:44,229 isn't she? 185 00:12:44,230 --> 00:12:46,630 She talks a lot better when she takes the rose out of her mouth. 186 00:12:49,250 --> 00:12:53,130 Whenever she speaks, I can almost hear the sound of castanets. 187 00:12:53,900 --> 00:12:55,140 I think it's loose dentures. 188 00:12:58,460 --> 00:13:01,000 What happened to the fire in your soul, Carter? 189 00:13:01,640 --> 00:13:03,980 Don't mind me, Mr. Wilbur. My pilot light just went out. 190 00:13:05,720 --> 00:13:06,720 Fire! 191 00:13:12,440 --> 00:13:18,220 What's with him? 192 00:13:18,840 --> 00:13:21,120 He is in love with a new Spanish teacher. 193 00:13:21,620 --> 00:13:23,480 Really? Really? Does he speak Spanish? 194 00:13:23,940 --> 00:13:24,940 Only two words. 195 00:13:25,280 --> 00:13:26,280 Taco and bell. 196 00:13:28,800 --> 00:13:29,559 What's that? 197 00:13:29,560 --> 00:13:31,240 Oh, we're having a picnic. 198 00:13:32,000 --> 00:13:33,660 A picnic? I thought we were going out to eat. 199 00:13:33,900 --> 00:13:35,400 Oh, I thought this would be more fun. 200 00:13:36,340 --> 00:13:37,360 Oh, yeah, that's sweet. 201 00:13:38,240 --> 00:13:39,240 A picnic. 202 00:13:39,480 --> 00:13:40,480 Did you bring the ants? 203 00:13:42,780 --> 00:13:43,800 I tell you what. 204 00:13:44,560 --> 00:13:48,140 I won't bring any ants if you won't bring any uncles. 205 00:13:56,430 --> 00:13:57,430 Very funny. 206 00:13:58,250 --> 00:14:00,190 Which tree should I spread the blanket under? 207 00:14:00,610 --> 00:14:02,790 Well, not this one. There's too many pigeons up there. 208 00:14:03,870 --> 00:14:06,610 How about the one over there by the bend in the chairs? Okay, honey. 209 00:14:07,110 --> 00:14:08,110 How's the grading going? 210 00:14:08,890 --> 00:14:09,890 Very strange. 211 00:14:10,550 --> 00:14:12,370 Well, what's so strange about it? 212 00:14:12,570 --> 00:14:14,670 Well, so far, every paper I've read has been terrific. 213 00:14:15,530 --> 00:14:17,170 Well, what's wrong with that? 214 00:14:17,910 --> 00:14:21,730 Julie, they are sweat hogs. Sweat hogs do not get A's. 215 00:14:23,250 --> 00:14:24,310 Well, what about Vinnie? 216 00:14:24,780 --> 00:14:28,120 I always say Vinny's for last. He always reads better when I'm a little tired. 217 00:14:31,060 --> 00:14:32,740 I better grade Juan's while we eat. 218 00:14:32,940 --> 00:14:33,940 Okay. 219 00:14:34,360 --> 00:14:35,880 He's writing it on Franklin Roosevelt. 220 00:14:37,020 --> 00:14:40,780 Franklin Delano Roosevelt by Juan Delano Epstein. Here, let me see it. 221 00:14:45,380 --> 00:14:48,940 You know, it's really strange. When I was in high school, I did my term paper 222 00:14:48,940 --> 00:14:49,940 Franklin Roosevelt. 223 00:14:49,980 --> 00:14:52,840 I called him a mighty white knight that fights for what's right. 224 00:14:57,319 --> 00:14:58,660 Really? So does Juan. 225 00:15:03,780 --> 00:15:06,400 Mighty white knight who tried to do what was right. 226 00:15:10,220 --> 00:15:13,060 This is it. This is the paper I handed in 11 years ago. 227 00:15:23,790 --> 00:15:26,590 What happened, huh? These papers here were supposed to be guaranteed. What 228 00:15:26,590 --> 00:15:31,470 happened? Mr. Cartier, he gave us our Fs. Yeah, five bucks for an F, Epstein. 229 00:15:31,470 --> 00:15:32,930 could have done it for free and gotten one. 230 00:15:35,670 --> 00:15:38,610 Well, look, I don't know what went wrong. I mean, he's a foolproof. 231 00:15:38,850 --> 00:15:40,930 They never fail to get good grades before. 232 00:15:41,230 --> 00:15:42,230 He knows. 233 00:15:42,450 --> 00:15:43,490 Mr. Carter knows. 234 00:15:43,870 --> 00:15:45,030 He knows. He knows! 235 00:15:58,320 --> 00:16:01,740 Because if he knew, we know he knew. Because if he knew, he'd let us know. 236 00:16:03,640 --> 00:16:05,160 That's easy for you to say. 237 00:16:06,840 --> 00:16:10,640 Well, I don't care if he knows or not. All I know is that you better get our 238 00:16:10,640 --> 00:16:11,479 money back. 239 00:16:11,480 --> 00:16:13,580 All right, Jack, be cool, sly. 240 00:16:13,860 --> 00:16:16,220 I'm working on it. I'm working on it. Oh, yeah? 241 00:16:18,340 --> 00:16:19,520 We'll work a little harder. 242 00:16:20,500 --> 00:16:21,560 Yeah, work overtime. 243 00:16:40,880 --> 00:16:42,440 I've seen better days. I've seen worse. 244 00:16:42,760 --> 00:16:45,260 How'd you do on your term paper? I got a B minus. 245 00:16:46,200 --> 00:16:47,780 I should have bought mine from you. 246 00:16:51,440 --> 00:16:52,820 Well, well, well. 247 00:16:54,200 --> 00:16:57,180 You must be the new little sweat hoggis. 248 00:16:59,580 --> 00:17:02,960 When you get tired of these guys, look me up, you know? 249 00:17:03,200 --> 00:17:04,098 You hear that? 250 00:17:04,099 --> 00:17:06,460 When you get tired of them, look us up. 251 00:17:08,040 --> 00:17:10,160 I will in the yellow pages. 252 00:17:10,730 --> 00:17:11,790 Under sleazeballs. 253 00:17:16,310 --> 00:17:20,950 That's cute. She's real cute, you know, but she'd be cuter with a mouth full of 254 00:17:20,950 --> 00:17:21,950 marbles. 255 00:17:22,310 --> 00:17:25,050 You know, Covelli, you have to move up just to be the pits. 256 00:17:27,130 --> 00:17:29,710 That's what you think, Epstein. 257 00:17:30,730 --> 00:17:33,530 My man Covelli don't have to move up. 258 00:17:33,810 --> 00:17:34,810 He's all... 259 00:17:44,430 --> 00:17:46,990 find yourself, you're going to be very disappointed. 260 00:17:50,110 --> 00:17:54,270 Hey, Covelli. What is it? I want you to take a look at this, because this here, 261 00:17:54,310 --> 00:17:57,950 the bum term papers you sold us, they all got Fs. Take a look. What do you 262 00:17:57,990 --> 00:17:58,990 This is impossible. 263 00:17:59,290 --> 00:18:01,530 These papers always got good grades before. 264 00:18:02,050 --> 00:18:04,290 I know what it is, Epstein. I'll tell you right now. 265 00:18:04,590 --> 00:18:05,610 You are stupid. 266 00:18:06,350 --> 00:18:07,370 So are your teachers. 267 00:18:07,610 --> 00:18:08,610 And up! 268 00:18:10,530 --> 00:18:13,450 Stick to what I say, and don't paraphrase, all right? 269 00:18:15,010 --> 00:18:16,010 Hey, that's me. 270 00:18:17,290 --> 00:18:18,330 Don't paraphrase. 271 00:18:20,790 --> 00:18:25,050 Yeah, well, these papers, you know, they was guaranteed. So why don't you just 272 00:18:25,050 --> 00:18:26,930 cough up our money? Oh, yeah? Or what? 273 00:18:27,290 --> 00:18:29,550 Or you're going to be coughing up internal organs. 274 00:18:30,990 --> 00:18:34,570 You think I'm going to cough organs? I don't think you know who you're speaking 275 00:18:34,570 --> 00:18:36,150 to. Are you talking to me? 276 00:18:36,390 --> 00:18:38,250 No, I'm talking to the bushes over there. 277 00:18:38,550 --> 00:18:41,590 Well, you must be talking to me because there ain't nobody else here. Oh, yeah, 278 00:18:41,590 --> 00:18:44,430 that's really funny. Hey, listen, I don't think you mean... 279 00:18:44,670 --> 00:18:46,170 to stand on. Hey, hey, hey. 280 00:18:46,530 --> 00:18:47,530 What's going on? 281 00:18:48,370 --> 00:18:49,370 Nothing, nothing, nothing. 282 00:18:49,910 --> 00:18:51,010 Hey, that's a nice coat. 283 00:18:51,870 --> 00:18:52,870 Use another one? 284 00:18:54,890 --> 00:18:55,889 I'll let you know. 285 00:18:55,890 --> 00:18:58,690 You guys, uh, helping each other with your geometry homework? 286 00:18:58,910 --> 00:18:59,970 Yeah, yeah, that's it, geometry. 287 00:19:00,210 --> 00:19:03,750 Come on, we gotta go, we gotta go. Let's go, little, uh, obtuse, let's go get 288 00:19:03,750 --> 00:19:04,750 hypotenuse. 289 00:19:06,910 --> 00:19:08,310 Obtuse, hypotenuse. 290 00:19:10,550 --> 00:19:11,550 Hey, Mr. Carter. 291 00:19:12,720 --> 00:19:14,280 Do you mind if I ask you a question? 292 00:19:14,980 --> 00:19:15,980 No, go ahead, Juan. 293 00:19:17,260 --> 00:19:19,800 How come these perfectly good term papers got Fs? 294 00:19:20,740 --> 00:19:23,200 Well, I don't know what you're complaining about. They're perfectly 295 00:19:25,060 --> 00:19:26,260 Besides, you didn't write them yourself. 296 00:19:26,560 --> 00:19:27,720 In fact, I think you bought them. 297 00:19:29,020 --> 00:19:34,080 You're accusing me, Juan Epstein, a perfectly good and upstanding citizen of 298 00:19:34,080 --> 00:19:35,800 this here community of China. 299 00:19:36,820 --> 00:19:38,120 I'm at a loss for words. 300 00:19:39,140 --> 00:19:41,920 The paper you handed in was one I handed in 11 years ago. 301 00:19:48,940 --> 00:19:50,340 It's a small world, isn't it? 302 00:19:52,740 --> 00:19:55,940 Well, look, you ain't going to get it out of me who I got him from. 303 00:19:56,160 --> 00:19:59,360 I mean, that would be ratting, right? And even though I'd be ratting on a 304 00:19:59,400 --> 00:20:01,900 rotten fink, I just ain't going to tell you. 305 00:20:02,260 --> 00:20:05,560 Well, you don't have to rat on anybody, Juan. I already know it was Carvelli. 306 00:20:06,460 --> 00:20:07,720 Good. Want to know where he lives? 307 00:20:10,480 --> 00:20:14,080 Don't have to tell me that, Juan. Honorable Father already know where he 308 00:20:15,040 --> 00:20:16,520 Gee, Pop, you know everything. 309 00:20:18,570 --> 00:20:20,710 Honorable father, very smart, number one son. 310 00:20:21,050 --> 00:20:22,590 Buy Xerox at 42. 311 00:20:24,470 --> 00:20:25,610 Sell it at 43. 312 00:20:26,990 --> 00:20:29,530 How did you figure on Covelli, Pop? 313 00:20:29,830 --> 00:20:31,790 Ah, good question, number one son. 314 00:20:32,330 --> 00:20:33,750 Old Chinese proverb. 315 00:20:34,310 --> 00:20:38,270 Man who try to pull wool over eyes wind up with sheep on face. 316 00:20:51,850 --> 00:20:54,190 half a book went out to break my face. What's the story, Epstein? 317 00:20:54,590 --> 00:20:58,130 Well, Carter blew the whistle on the phony paper scam the man knew all along. 318 00:20:58,450 --> 00:21:02,030 Oh, I can't believe it. Yeah, he passed out a list of all the phony papers to 319 00:21:02,030 --> 00:21:03,110 all the teachers in the district. 320 00:21:03,350 --> 00:21:04,390 That dirty rat. 321 00:21:04,850 --> 00:21:07,170 Every time one of them turns up, they get a big F. 322 00:21:07,730 --> 00:21:08,730 Guy's the lowest. 323 00:21:09,190 --> 00:21:12,070 I've never heard of anything so dirty or rotten or underhanded. 324 00:21:13,990 --> 00:21:15,350 Could use a guy like that. 325 00:21:17,950 --> 00:21:20,690 So what are you going to do with yourself now that the heat's on? I don't 326 00:21:20,730 --> 00:21:24,750 I think maybe I'll, uh, steal a motorhome, and just sleep until the 327 00:21:24,850 --> 00:21:25,850 you know? 328 00:21:27,570 --> 00:21:28,950 Don't forget to back over yourself. 329 00:21:32,230 --> 00:21:33,490 Epstein, I'm glad you're here. Come on. 330 00:21:34,370 --> 00:21:35,370 All right. 331 00:21:35,450 --> 00:21:38,570 Now, I have decided to give all you guys one more chance. 332 00:21:38,910 --> 00:21:40,010 Now, count it. One. 333 00:21:44,210 --> 00:21:45,210 One. 334 00:21:46,870 --> 00:21:51,050 I want you to make sure you do your term papers yourselves this time. 335 00:21:51,530 --> 00:21:53,930 All right, but Mr. Carter, can I still do the potato famine? 336 00:21:55,470 --> 00:21:56,610 Oh, I don't think so, Benny. 337 00:21:57,170 --> 00:22:00,670 Mr. Carter, do it different this time. I'll do it from the point of view of the 338 00:22:00,670 --> 00:22:01,670 potato. 339 00:22:06,610 --> 00:22:08,870 Make sure you go to the library this time, okay? 340 00:22:09,210 --> 00:22:12,290 I mean, like, what for? Nobody ain't selling no term papers there, right? 341 00:22:14,790 --> 00:22:21,700 Just kidding. Fooling. Well, I, for one, am very happy. be to vindicate 342 00:22:21,700 --> 00:22:23,260 myself, Mr. Carter. 343 00:22:23,580 --> 00:22:25,580 And I've even made up my own topic. 344 00:22:26,080 --> 00:22:27,080 King Tut. 345 00:22:27,800 --> 00:22:30,920 The story of a man all wrapped up in himself. 346 00:22:33,960 --> 00:22:38,000 And, Mr. Carter, how come you're going to give us a second chance, huh? How 347 00:22:38,000 --> 00:22:42,520 come? Yeah, how come, man? What made you change your mind on us? Well, I told 348 00:22:42,520 --> 00:22:46,300 you guys that when I went to school here, I handed in that term paper. 349 00:22:46,580 --> 00:22:47,580 Yeah. 350 00:22:48,320 --> 00:22:49,320 But, uh, 351 00:22:51,400 --> 00:22:52,500 I never said I wrote it. 352 00:22:57,960 --> 00:23:03,160 He is kidding us, isn't he? Oh, he must be kidding. He would never do anything 353 00:23:03,160 --> 00:23:05,560 like that. Oh, yes, he would, Arnold Horschak. 354 00:23:05,800 --> 00:23:06,800 He wasn't kidding. 355 00:23:07,020 --> 00:23:08,020 Kidding about what? 356 00:23:33,260 --> 00:23:36,240 I thought you deserved another one. Okay. But this time I got to bring one 357 00:23:36,240 --> 00:23:38,040 uncles. Okay. Which one? 358 00:23:38,260 --> 00:23:39,260 My uncle Joe. 359 00:23:39,900 --> 00:23:40,900 The drunk. 360 00:23:41,100 --> 00:23:44,020 That's right. My uncle Joe the drunk. And one time he's in a bar. He's making 361 00:23:44,020 --> 00:23:48,260 lot of noise. And this woman comes over and she says, sir, you are drunk and 362 00:23:48,260 --> 00:23:49,300 you're making too much noise. 363 00:23:49,620 --> 00:23:50,620 What did he say? 364 00:23:50,780 --> 00:23:53,680 He said, my dear woman, you're ugly. 365 00:23:56,020 --> 00:23:59,860 And she says, well, you are the drunkest man I've ever seen in my life. 366 00:24:00,140 --> 00:24:02,580 And he says, but I'll. 367 00:24:02,830 --> 00:24:06,130 Wake up tomorrow morning sober and you'll still be ugly. 368 00:24:25,930 --> 00:24:27,430 Welcome back. 369 00:24:28,690 --> 00:24:31,730 Your dreams were your ticket out. 370 00:24:32,780 --> 00:24:38,680 Welcome back to that same old place that you laughed about. 371 00:24:39,440 --> 00:24:43,120 Well, the names have all changed since you hung around. 372 00:24:43,800 --> 00:24:47,640 But those dreams have remained and they've turned around. 373 00:24:48,760 --> 00:24:50,840 Who'd have thought they'd need ya? 374 00:24:51,040 --> 00:24:56,400 Who'd have thought they'd need ya? Back here where we need ya. Back here where 375 00:24:56,400 --> 00:24:58,880 we need ya. We tease him a lot. 376 00:24:59,160 --> 00:25:02,360 Cause we got him on the spot. Welcome back. 377 00:25:03,100 --> 00:25:06,600 Welcome back. Welcome back. Welcome back.